Better that girl has a beauty than brains because boys see better than they think.

R. Byrne

Friendship

As a show of love, business partners Tom and Jack decided that whoever died first, the other would put ten thousand bucks cash in his coffin. As it happened, when Tom died Jack was so distressed and absent-minded that he made a check out for fifteen thousand dollars.

Business

‘I do not understand. If you are selling these computers way under cost, how is it you are showing a profit?’ asked an accountant his new Boss. ‘Simple’, answered the Boss, ‘we make our money fixing them’.

Wise Advice

‘Always remember,’ said the successful businessman to his young offspring, ‘there are the only two things that will ensure your success in business.’ ‘What are they?’ asked the son. ‘Honesty and wisdom,’ answered the father. ‘Honesty?!’ asked the son. ‘Absolutely right. No matter how it may be to your detriment, no matter what your colleagues may say, always keep your word if you have given it,’ answered his father. ‘And what about wisdom?’ asked the son. ‘Don’t be a blockhead and give it!’ answered
the father.

Cash transaction

The well-dressed businessman was walking down a dark street in New York when he was accosted by a mugger. Ordered to hand over all his money, the businessman did so, placing one hundred dollars in the mugger’s hand. Than he took back two dollars and slipped them into his pocket. ‘What the hell are you
doing?’ asked the robber. ‘I always take a two percent discount for cash transactions,’ answered the businessman.

Accost – approach and speak to; blockhead – a very stupid person; fix – repair; mugger – a person who attacks and robs someone in the street; offspring – someone’s child.

Computers

A: Hello, tech support.

B: Hello, sir. I’m having trouble getting my computer to start.

A: Okay, sir. Do you know what may have caused the problem?

B: I installed a new program. And since then Windows won’t come on.

A: Why don’t we try booting into the safe mode. Do you know how to do that?

B: No.

A: Turn the computer on and as it is starting up hit F8. It should give you a menu of start up options.

B: Okay, … no, I didn’t get a menu.

A: Hmm … shut the computer down and try it again.

B: Well, … just a moment. … No, that’s not working; no matter how many times I press the keys.

A: Which keys? I said F8!

B: That’s what I’m pressing – the letter F and the number 8.

<== попередня сторінка	\|	наступна сторінка ==>
Make up your own advertisement.	\|	Robbery

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